“My son, thou art not yet strong and prudent in thy love.”
“Wherefore O my Lord?”
“Because for a little opposition thou fallest away from thy undertakings, and too eagerly seekest after consolation. The strong lover standeth fast in temptations, and believeth not the evil persuasions of the enemy. As in prosperity I please him, so in adversity I do not displease.”
“The prudent lover considerest not the gift of the lover so much as the love of the giver. He looketh for the affection more than the value, and setteth all gifts lower than the Beloved. The noble lover resteth not in the gift, but in Me above every gift.”
Thomas a Kempis, The Imitation of Christ
prudent – adj – acting with or showing care and thought for the future
Kempis has uncovered the weak lover. The one who falls away in the storm, seeking only for consolation. He has proclaimed the strong lover. The one who stands fast in the face of temptation and whose love does not rest on the whims of circumstance. Now we find that there is yet another quality of love that we are called to in our Imitation of Christ. The Lord turns his conversation to the prudent lover.
How often we mistake the gift for the lover. This is the sign of imprudent love. The gift is wonderful and amazing. We wrap ourselves up in the gift. We hug it and caress it. We proclaim the gift to the world. It thrills the soul, but like all gifts it fades in value. The storms of life batter the gift and the sands of time wear it down. Suddenly that thrill is gone, that tingle that we called love has faded away and because we have been so focused on the gift instead of the lover, prudent love that might have been is never found.
Jesus speaks of this love in Matthew 13:5-6.
5 Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. 6 But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root.
The gift of the Gospel is heard and perhaps even believed but the faith that springs up is in the gift, not in the giver, not in the lover of our souls. So when the circumstances of life arise there is no depth to hold our faith because our eyes are not on Jesus.
Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2
As great as the gift is (For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord .Romans 6:23) it is only great because it opens the path for us to focus on The Lover. If we take our eyes off him….
As is so often the case, the qualities of our vertical relationship with God speak into our horizontal relationships as well. The gifts of our life both given and received should conduits of intimacy drawing us into relationship with others. When the gifts are the focus, the love is compromised and when the circumstances change one finds that it is not love at all. We are all to often ready to believe that gifts (given or received) are enough but there is no endurance in gifts when they do not bring clarity of focus on the lover.
The prudent lover looks to the future, not to the present or the past. The actions of the prudent lover are framed to sustain and grow intimacy over time with the beloved. This is the focus of a steadfast relationship, one that will stand the test of time. It is this kind of love that Paul speaks about in 1 Corinthians.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Be prudent in love, setting ALL gifts lower in value than the lover who gives them.
Fan Into Flame Ministries 