Archive for January 11th, 2011

We had a week of prayer and fasting for Compelled Church last week.  I found myself pondering this thing we call prayer.  Prayer means many things to a lot of people.  Prayer can mean a lot of different things to me.  But the prayer that I found myself praying time after time last week and I think one that is going to be an ongoing part of my prayer life, devotional life and life.  It is a simple prayer.  It is a prodigal’s prayer.

Lord don’t let me blow it…again. 

It seems a little self-deprecating to me, but it is my heartfelt prayer.  It does not relieve me in any way of daily walking out my faith, but it is the cry of a man who knows beyond a shadow of a doubt how easily holiness and righteousness can slip away into the night when his focus wavers from the one who sacrificed so much to save him.  It is the cry of the man standing before Jesus, “Lord I believe, help my unbelief.”  (Mark 9:24) when the fate of his son laid in the balance. It is the recognition that God is not the one that stands in the way of my spiritual growth.  My biggest roadblock is me.  It may not come in anything that I say or in any of the big things that I do.  It is the little stuff of unbelief that add up in our lives until suddenly we look around and realize that we have drifted far from where we want to be.  Perhaps it is part of the 12 step program for prodigals.  Everyday, Lord don’t let me blow it….again and Thank you for ALWAYS being their for me.  Keep me focused on Love, Love , Serve.  I lay it all at your feet, if I try to pick any of it up again do what it takes to keep my hands off. (as gently as possible 🙂

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